When I was a young boy, it was evident to the majority of my family that I was a bright kid. Not necessarily Nobel material (cheap though the award may be these days), but smarter than your average bear, anyway. As I grew, my grades at school stayed strong, and it seemed that I was on the way to great things.
Before this begins to sound like a Charles Dickens novel, I want to offer a little bit of family history. I was born in Northern Minnesota, in a little town named Ely which is located near the Canadian border. It is a small town with a harsh climate, heavily reliant on the two harsh industries of logging and iron ore mining. It is a place that encourages endurance and determination in its’ residents: a legacy of which I am proud.
Like many in Ely, my ancestors only came to this country a few generations ago in search of work and land and opportunity. Half of my ancestors consisted of German lumberjacks who arrived in the north woods and began to apply their trade anew. The other half is a mix of English and Slavic blood. All of them in search of promise in the new world which they would pay for with sweat, aches, and even blood.
Given this hardscrabble existence, one can imagine what it meant to see such a promising young sapling spring up in the midst of the family. Here was a very, very smart young man who will do great things, who will redeem the family name in a way. Here is a boy who may one day be an "important" man with an "important" job. People will call him “Mr. Koschak.”
I remember hearing about how important it was for me to work hard in school, and to one day go to College. College, you see, being the great escape from the hardship of the blue collar life and living paycheck to paycheck. My grandfather, a retired county foreman, used to dig through trash cans to collect aluminum cans, so that he could sell them and give me the money for the college tuition I would have to pay more than a decade yet in the future. This was a serious responsibility and not to be wasted.
So, I grew up and grew older and carried this charge close to my heart. I got married and now I have children of my own. I have gone to College and have had many jobs over these years. In spite of these accomplishments, I still wonder whether or not I have been a faithful vessel for so much hope. Further, I have wondered whether this hope has been somewhat misplaced.... or whether I even understand it at all…
Part 2 coming soon…
oh do continue to write. I love reading it.
ReplyDeleteLove you,
Do me a favor and define "soon"
ReplyDeleteBecause it would seem that soon, would have been sooner, than now for part two, and i'm waiting..
So, like Cobluegirl and Ryan, I'm waiting for more! Having known you first as a somewhat discomforting aquaintance in high school whose locker was next to mine, and then later as a great friend who was learning how to navigate a new found faith, one thing that has never changed was the burden ("the charge") you've so eloquently spoken about in this post. It's a great and maybe even proper burden. It certainly has pushed you forward through a great education as evidenced in a conversation we once had about the nuances of Hebrew poetry and prophecy in the book of Psalms (one in which of course were instructing me.) I'm hoping the 2nd part of this post shares the success you've found in laying this burden down, or as you've foreshadowd, a new understanding of the burden. It is evident to me that the Lord has already taken upon Himself to fulfill the greater part of the burden - that is, the redemption of the family name - for redemption is His work alone and is His to complete (a work that was fully completed in your faith.) I am confident those who placed their hope in you have not misplaced it, but I expect they've wrongly defined it. I wait with expectation for the next post, thinking somewhat that you've set us all up and that you'll share a new perspective on the burden and an enlightened understanding of the hope. If not, well, you'll find it - even if only lookng backward from the peak of the mountain your'e currently climbing. We look forward to seeing you guys in a few weeks, and happy birthday (I know it was yesterday!)
ReplyDeleteWyatt, my deepest thanks for your comments. My eyes well up as I remember the journey that you and I have been on together (though the miles separate us). I remember that locker, and that quiet pale kid who had his locker besides mine! Rich stuff...
ReplyDeleteFor the purposes of this stream of posts, I wanted to stay closer to vocation as my undergirding topic. As a teacher and minister and employee, it seems to touch so many of the questions I receive. I wanted to glimpse into something more, something infinitely more profound, but not just dive into the abstract head first. After all, in this 'blog as a whole, I want to try to bridge the gulf between the secular and the sacred. Maybe another way of looking at it might be that I am showing that there is no such gulf or distinction! Remember Neo, there is no spoon!
I appreciate your mountain analogy, as I have a way of driving hard and exhausting myself before I have peace enough to meditate on what just happened! It seems that you know me all too well...
You touch on a great many topics in your much-appreciated response which I felt were too far off the main path for me to try to address in this particular series of posts. I need to think on these other things and translate them into more James-ian language and leave the Paul-ine way of saying it to the research papers!
Thank you, Wildman. I look forward to seeing you again!!!
Thanks for your response to my comments! It was GREAT to see you guys and the kids again and catch up. I can't help wondering, how many cups of coffee did I drink? Your great hospitality never let me see the bottom of my cup. =)
ReplyDeleteWell, as clumsy as my writing is, you did well at sorting through it as always. I'm usually (at least) one or two steps behind your thought process, so I appreciate your patient response! I'm looking forward to reading through to the conclusion as I get the time.
See you guys in... 2011!
Many thanks for your additional comments...
ReplyDeleteIt was so very, very wonderful to have you in our home again. I think it is the mark of a deep friendship when two people can be separated for some time, and then, come back together for a visit and seemingly pick up where they left off... I always feel that way with the two of you, and it is a blessing to both Rachael and I. Our home feels a little brighter with you in it, and a little too quiet when you are gone. Thank you for fitting us in.
Your writing is hardly clumsy, nor are you slow (although I appreciate your implied compliments). I think that with reading any writing, to really get into the author's mind is difficult to the point of nearly impossible. The reader can have a tough time understanding all of the gives and takes and decisions that the author must fight through in order to produce their work... It must, after all, be readable.
Additionally, in my mind, it is way more effective and maybe more enjoyable for the reader if all of the points are not clarified to the point of redundancy. The idea is to give the reader enough to chew on, but not satisfy all of their hunger... I want people to read it and respond in some way... "Hey, I think that he overlooked this." "Hey, I think that maybe he hasn't considered that..." A piece of writing is only ever another foothold on the mountain and not the summit.
Thanks again for the comments, and I will "chat" at you soon.
Patrick